I am balanced and centered in the midst of 'life happening'

Much has been written and shared about meditation and mindfulness. They are the 'catch words' of our generation.  Speaking about quieting the mind and being centered is not the same as living it.

Why is meditation important?   Mediation is important to calmly focus on what needs to be done and enjoy the process.  Meditation is vital to creativity, inspiration, and innovation.

Meditation is many things.  It's not necessarily sitting with our legs crossed on the floor and repeating a mantra (positive words or phrases). We can meditate while running, walking, washing dishes, eating lunch, listening to music, dancing and so on. 

Meditation can be a way of life, a way of being fully present in everything we do. It's not about worrying about what's 'on our plate', what's going on in the lives of friends and family or what's happening in the world.  It's not about being anxious about the future or romanticizing or being remorseful about the past.

Meditation is about breathing deeply so that our flight-or-fight response drops away.  It's about learning to respond with calm assurance to whatever crises or deadline presents.  Meditation is not about allowing someone else's fears to become our own.  Meditation is about learning how to be that still, calm space known as 'the eye of the storm' and to live a life of gratitude, wonder and joy.

Meditation and mindfulness are close friends. Mindfulness is about being fully present here now in each moment.  Meditation helps us to be mindful.

We may think we are being present but often we are not.  Being fully present is about listening without thinking about what we are going to say next.  Being fully present is about enjoying the moment we are experiencing, and not getting caught up in emotional dramas or mental commentary.   

Mindfulness is about appreciating life, not living for our next holiday or wanting to be anyone else. It is about accepting who we are and where we are at. 

Meditation and mindfulness help us to be grateful and appreciate what we already have.  Gratitude and appreciation are the foundation for positive transition and change.  Meditation and mindfulness provide us with the tools for being calm and clear in the face of adversity, conflict, and stress. Meditation and mindfulness help us to create the change we wish to see in business, life, and the world.

Brené Brown’s Ted Talk, The Power of Vulnerability is relevant and poignant. Fostering connection, compassion, belonging and vulnerability in the business world would be a game-changer. Corporate cultures would become welcoming, nurturing, and supportive, and long-term profits would rise.

Brené's research findings are fundamental to fostering the kind of change and long-term success that would be most beneficial to all concerned.

Here's what she shares:

Connection is why we are here. It gives purpose and meaning to our lives.

Connection is a part of our biology. Everyone wants to feel connected.

Shame is what gets in the way of connection.

Most people believe that there’s something fundamentally wrong with them; that if others knew or saw something about them, no one would want to connect with them.

No one wants to talk about shame. The less you talk about shame, the more you experience it.

What underlies shame is the feeling of not being good enough, beautiful enough, smart enough, rich enough, successful enough, promoted enough and so on.

What underpins it all is excruciating vulnerability.

In order for connection to happen, we have to allow ourselves to be really seen.

Whole-hearted people have and live from a deep sense of worthiness. They believe that they are worthy of love and belonging. They have a deep sense of courage. They know and share who they are with their whole heart.

Whole-hearted people have the courage to be imperfect. They have the compassion to be kind to themselves first and then to others.

We can’t practice compassion with others if we don’t treat ourselves kindly.

Whole-hearted people have connection because of their authenticity. They were willing to let go of who they thought they should be in order to be who they are.

Whole-hearted people fully embrace vulnerability. They believe that what makes them vulnerable makes them beautiful.

Whole-hearted people don’t talk about vulnerability being comfortable or excruciating.

They talk about vulnerability being necessary.

They talk about the willingness to say, “I love you” first. They talk about the willingness to do something where there were no guarantees; the willingness to invest in a relationship that may or may not work out.

Whole-hearted people embrace vulnerability and stop controlling and predicting.

Vulnerability is the core of shame, fear, and our struggle for worthiness. Vulnerability is also the birthplace of joy, creativity, belonging and love.

Vulnerability can be a myriad of different things, like asking someone for help when we’re sick, initiating sex with our partner, waiting for the doctor to call and so on.

We live in a vulnerable world. One of the ways we deal with this is to numb vulnerability.

We are the most in debt, obese, addicted, and medicated society in U.S. History.

We cannot be selectively numb.

When we numb vulnerability, grief, shame, fear, and disappointment, we numb joy, gratitude, and happiness.

We numb with addiction. We numb by trying to make everything that’s uncertain, certain. There is so much, “I’m right, you’re wrong. Shut up.”

Politics is a prime example. There is no discourse or conversation. There is just blame.

Blame is simply a way to discharge pain and discomfort.

We try to be perfect, but it doesn’t work. We try to make our children perfect, and that’s dangerous to their health and wellbeing.

We need to tell our children that they are not perfect, and that life can be challenging.

We need to tell our children, “You are worthy of love and belonging, and I love you.” Imagine a world several generations in the future if our children were raised feeling worthy.

We pretend that what we’re doing doesn’t have a huge impact on other people. What we do impacts our friends, family, and everyone in our sphere of influence. We pretend that what corporations do doesn’t have a huge impact on our future. Bailouts, rebates, and cleanups are not solving our problems.

There is another way:

to let ourselves be deeply and vulnerably seen.

to love with our whole hearts, even though there is no guarantee.

to practice gratitude and joy no matter how we are feeling.

to stop worrying and just be grateful.

to be grateful to feel so vulnerable and alive.

to believe, "I am enough".

When we come from a place of knowing “I am enough”, we stop screaming and start listening. We’re kinder and gentler to the people around us, and we’re kinder and gentler to ourselves.

Gossip is about judging others.  It’s about deciding what’s wrong with somebody else, so we feel better about ourselves. Gossip is not about kindness and love.  It’s about judgment and fear.

Gossip is everywhere.  It’s all over the news.   It’s on entertainment and reality shows.  We have magazines dedicated to gossip, like People and Us. Gossip permeates our culture.  It’s easy to get sucked in. 

Gossip is about looking outside of ourselves for validation and wanting someone else’s piece of the pie.

The top three reasons to avoid gossiping are:

What goes around comes around

What we judge we become.  When we gossip about and judge someone that is exactly the kind of person we are going to become.  

It may be dressed up differently, but we will find a way to manifest the very thing we disdain in our lives.

Gossip reinforces ‘lack and limitation’

Gossiping keeps us small and focusing on, consciously or subconsciously, everything that is ‘wrong’ with us. 

It keeps us in fear and out of the love we so greatly desire.

Gossip keeps our hearts at war. 

When we are in judgment and gossiping, we have a heart at war, not at peace. 

Gossip keeps us in conflict, frustration, anger and sorrow. 

It reinforces everything we ‘hate’ about the world without looking inside and filling ourselves with love.

When others around us are gossiping, we don’t have to participate. 

We can ignore the conversation, change the subject or leave. 

It’s about choosing a new way of being, regardless of the reaction of others. 

It’s about choosing love.

We are never too old to try something new.

I put on skis in my 30's

I tried yoga in my 40's, and

I started painting in my 50's

I thought I would never enjoy going down a mountain with no handrails.  I was wrong.  Something happens when you persevere, choose to do your best and start by following excellent (and kind) instructors down slippery unknown terrain.

I thought I would never enjoy anything as much as running after my body was injured and in constant pain from overuse.  I was wrong.  I learned to breathe, stretch, and strengthen my body in a new way.  I gained a community of friends who enjoy taking care of themselves on many levels.

I thought I didn’t have a talented bone in my body.  I was wrong.  Something happens to you when you have a wonderful teacher and allow yourself to fall in love with what you are painting.  I learned that with practice, talent can blossom and grow in quite unexpected, amazing ways. Painting has opened my eyes to beauty, appreciating colors, hues, and shadows.  Wondering whether this photo or that will make a good subject for my next endeavor.

It’s never too late to expand our horizons. Winston Churchill wrote a wonderful book about painting, called Painting as a Pastime, in which he poetically describes a hobby that lifted him from depression and rewarded a nation with a treasure trove of work. Art Therapy has helped many suffering from anxiety and post-traumatic stress disorder.  Being part of a creative process and making something which you and others can enjoy is healing for the mind, body, and soul.

Give something new a try.  You might be surprised by how much fun you have and what you learn and create in the process. Life can be an adventure, no matter how heavy things feel in any moment.  There is always the next breath and another vista if we are open to new possibilities. We are never too old unless we choose to be.